“I owe it to my talent to create a life that can hold it.”
What moves me the most in my work is supporting clients that have the same level of passion to create that I do. My own passion has been the dominating factor in every decision I’ve made in my life, both professionally and personally. Helping clients to orient their life around this brings me immense joy but it also comes with a great deal of responsibility.
Questions we work through are things like: Will I be able to make space to audition? Does this town I live in feel like a place where I can further my career? What if I book a film? Will I be able to go back to my current job? Is it fair to the rest of my life that this is a priority for me?
I took a break from the grind in 2014 to reevaluate my relationship to what felt like a Sisyphean career. I was chasing my own tail, unable to keep my head above water, and moving further and further into debt and depression. I was able to create plays that were rewarding but always lost money. I was growing more and more frustrated.
I knew there was something more to mine in my heart. I knew that I was sabotaging opportunities and was, somehow, unable to handle even this slightest amount of success.My instinct told me that I needed Men’s Work. I needed to find a way to take an honest and sober look at all areas of my life. To take responsibility and to show up—to stop avoiding painful and uncomfortable truths. And they were uncomfortable.
I was sloppy in my finances, I was a chronic people-pleaser, I was scattered in all areas of health. How we do one thing truly is how we do everything. Over the last 8 years, I have shined the light of accountability on all areas of my life and as I did, new opportunities began to find me. It’s very hard to audition when the rest of life is a mess. It’s hard to produce a film when I am in massive debt. Healing the practical things in my life—the so-called little things—made my creative life begin to feel inspired and alive. It hasn’t languished away as I had thought. It was always there. Just beneath the mess that had previously blurred it.
Now my life is a beautiful balance of my passion for coaching and acting. I don’t have to choose. I got to build the life I wanted. I also realized that I never want to stop helping and serving people and I now have structures in place for both.
I have the privilege to help artists build a solid daily life filled with purpose even when it seems like their career has dried up. And I also get to help successful business professionals find play and fun in their perceived repetitive routines.
Seeking balance has meant committing to a holistic approach where depth, balance, and integrity are foundational. Committing to accountability, focus, and the occasional risk. A most important, committing to a group of good-hearted men who I trust to sharpen me with honest feedback.
This has worked for me and it is still working for me. I have so much more room to grow… and I love it.
